Axe Murderer

So, we've all see the Axe body spray commercials. If you're a dude and you use this stuff, the women just won't leave you alone. They'll practically be throwing themselves at you because you'll smell all macho and women just love macho-scented men. Great marketing campaign. But anyone who's actually inhaled this stuff knows a little spritz is enough to choke a horse.

 

I suspect a lady's man, wanting to make a fine impression on his lady friend whipped out this stuff to freshen up and she punched him right in the stomach as his finger readied to press the button on top of the can. Such an action from the woman caused her would-be date to drop the Axe in our lot right along with the rest of the garbage that lies here.

 

If you suspected this Parking Lot Diaries entry was about someone getting whacked in our parking lot or that we found an axe, we're incredibly sorry to disappoint. To date, we're happy to report there have been no axes nor axe murders in our lot. However, a large hunting knife with a retractable blade was found. This lot aims to please our morbid curiosities.

High Society

In each culture, it's necessary to align with social pressures to fit in. Any misstep in conversation or fashion faux pas, and you're bound to be banished to the kiddie table at the next big family get together. Of course, these ways of conducting ourselves vary greatly for men and for women. In a way, women are held to a higher standard than men. Men can get away without wearing a speck of makeup, bleaching their mustaches, or shaving their legs. Men can belch, and will even turn an awkward fart into a hilariously executed punctuation within a conversation.

 

Unfortunately, however, it's no so easy for women. Social norms dictate women must look and behave a certain, proper way. Women who venture out of the house without painting their faces are often criticized for not doing so. And neglecting to bleach stray upper lip hairs? Some women would rather curl up and hide than have anyone spot them with unwanted body hair. Many women look forward to the winter months where pants and long skirts hide their unshaven legs so they can enjoy a little lapse in social pressures for their legs to look a certain way.

 

The rituals women go through on a daily basis to fit in with social pressures are cumbersome and time-consuming. It's possible in the quest for perfection, a step of the beauty regimen is incomplete or abandoned all together in an effort to make it to the office on time. Or say, there's just not enough time to shave your legs before leaving home. Well, you guessed it, the Parking Lot has you covered!

 

Sanitarily contained in a Ziploc baggy is your own pink razor (how feminine!). Your new razor's name is "Indigo Knight", which is coincidentally the name of a modeling agency in Louisiana. Now, if that hidden wintery leg stubble is leaving you feeling inadequate, you sneak a few shaves in your work day.

 

Oh, and speaking of hygiene double standards, the Parking Lot also has menstrual pads available free of charge.