Axe Murderer

So, we've all see the Axe body spray commercials. If you're a dude and you use this stuff, the women just won't leave you alone. They'll practically be throwing themselves at you because you'll smell all macho and women just love macho-scented men. Great marketing campaign. But anyone who's actually inhaled this stuff knows a little spritz is enough to choke a horse.

 

I suspect a lady's man, wanting to make a fine impression on his lady friend whipped out this stuff to freshen up and she punched him right in the stomach as his finger readied to press the button on top of the can. Such an action from the woman caused her would-be date to drop the Axe in our lot right along with the rest of the garbage that lies here.

 

If you suspected this Parking Lot Diaries entry was about someone getting whacked in our parking lot or that we found an axe, we're incredibly sorry to disappoint. To date, we're happy to report there have been no axes nor axe murders in our lot. However, a large hunting knife with a retractable blade was found. This lot aims to please our morbid curiosities.

Lot Art

Art is a matter of perception. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. So, rather than get annoyed with the amount of garbage in the lot, choose to alter your belief for just a moment. Perhaps it wasn't a careless litterbug who emptied their ashtray or discarded their McDonald's wrappers. Maybe they were making an attempt at urban art. Somehow trash doesn't seem so bad when you look at it through art-loving eyes.

 

Embrace the discarded chicken wing bones and the broken bottles. Admire the scope of the busted windshield glass. Heck, I believe I've seen broken glass all over the floor at artistic installation at the contemporary art museum. The stuff in our lot is so real, so gritty, so admirable. Take this Kleenex-henge. Oh, that form. Oh, the positioning of the snotted-up tissue wads. Pure genius!